We are making many family memories this week...and I plan to share them all with you...later. For now, I will leave myself some reminders here so I will be able to know which stories to tell. The titles will leave you guessing...or maybe not. :)
- Bree christens Ya-ya
- Riley spews
- The great mix up (She she and icky ricky)
...and to think my step mom has only been here two days so far. We've got two and half more days to go!!!! Wooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, November 13, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
How has Bree's situation changed me?
Having Bree changed a lot about me. At least I feel that it did. It has made me more anxious, I feel like I am always waiting for the next "thing" to go wrong with her. The next surgery, the next developmental delay, the next set of bad news. I am a pretty optimistic person so it is a little weird to always feel that way. However, it is the truth. Just like we got news that her MRI came back fine, I just can't believe it. I am happy, but I wonder if they missed something.
I do look at life differently, more in a religious sense however. Before Bree I was a pretty solid believer in God, and once she was born I began to waver. Many people argue with me about "How could you not think there is a God? Look at how great she is doing!" and I argue right back that "Why would God allow a baby to be born this early and struggle so much and go through so much?" She is one tough cookie of a kid, and that's why she is here today. I do not know anyone else that has had CPR for 28 minutes and is still alive today. It has also made me kind of bitter towards pregnant women who complain that they wish they could have their baby early "Just to be done with it". Yes, I have had people say that to my face and all I can do is turn around and walk away.
My relationship with Adam has gotten stronger, and I have seem him emerge as a better and more helpful Dad and husband because of all this. He sees what it takes to take care of the girls and he has really stepped it up. I feel like with Riley that I value our one on one time more because I spend so much time on Bree between feedings her, therapy stuff, etc. Sometimes I feel bad that she doesn't get as much attention if Bree would have been a 'normal' baby, but then I remind myself that it is what it is, and all we can do is our best. No need to mope and worry about something you can't change. With family, a few things have changed. I have learned that not everyone is going to approve of what we do with Bree, and it is not their life to live. We are the ones living day to day with her, and we will make the best decisions that we think are right. We are her parents, not anyone else.
I do look at life differently, more in a religious sense however. Before Bree I was a pretty solid believer in God, and once she was born I began to waver. Many people argue with me about "How could you not think there is a God? Look at how great she is doing!" and I argue right back that "Why would God allow a baby to be born this early and struggle so much and go through so much?" She is one tough cookie of a kid, and that's why she is here today. I do not know anyone else that has had CPR for 28 minutes and is still alive today. It has also made me kind of bitter towards pregnant women who complain that they wish they could have their baby early "Just to be done with it". Yes, I have had people say that to my face and all I can do is turn around and walk away.
My relationship with Adam has gotten stronger, and I have seem him emerge as a better and more helpful Dad and husband because of all this. He sees what it takes to take care of the girls and he has really stepped it up. I feel like with Riley that I value our one on one time more because I spend so much time on Bree between feedings her, therapy stuff, etc. Sometimes I feel bad that she doesn't get as much attention if Bree would have been a 'normal' baby, but then I remind myself that it is what it is, and all we can do is our best. No need to mope and worry about something you can't change. With family, a few things have changed. I have learned that not everyone is going to approve of what we do with Bree, and it is not their life to live. We are the ones living day to day with her, and we will make the best decisions that we think are right. We are her parents, not anyone else.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Speechless
Speechless and amazed I sat in the doctor's office today holding Bree on my lap. The doctor had just told us that her MRI looked perfect! He said there was a little bit of asymmetry with the two sides of the brain, but all within normal parameters and something he would expect to see in a normal human being.
I made sure that I asked in every possible way that it was fine. No evidence of brain bleeds? Nope! No evidence of damage from CPR twice? Nope! No evidence of damage from oxygen deprivation? NOPE! Okay. So....okay.
I am overjoyed (obviously) but slightly confused. That leaves us with no explanation for why she has such low muscle tone, and is a little bit behind physically in developmental standards. We are being sent for Bree to have some blood work done to make sure that there is nothing wrong with her genetic make up that would account for that. They will check her chromosomes to see if there are any abnormalities. I have a feeling that those are going to come back perfectly fine.
The doctor was just as confused as we were and made sure to run through her history with us to make sure he had the right kid. Born 15 weeks early? Yup! Grade III bilateral brain bleeds? Yup! CPR twice...once for 28 minutes? Yup! All he could say is "Well she sure is happy...interesting...it is rare to see a recovery like this."
He did say one thing that made perfect sense to me, and I agree with him in every way. "She is one lucky little girl..." YUP!
...and we are lucky to have her.
I made sure that I asked in every possible way that it was fine. No evidence of brain bleeds? Nope! No evidence of damage from CPR twice? Nope! No evidence of damage from oxygen deprivation? NOPE! Okay. So....okay.
I am overjoyed (obviously) but slightly confused. That leaves us with no explanation for why she has such low muscle tone, and is a little bit behind physically in developmental standards. We are being sent for Bree to have some blood work done to make sure that there is nothing wrong with her genetic make up that would account for that. They will check her chromosomes to see if there are any abnormalities. I have a feeling that those are going to come back perfectly fine.
The doctor was just as confused as we were and made sure to run through her history with us to make sure he had the right kid. Born 15 weeks early? Yup! Grade III bilateral brain bleeds? Yup! CPR twice...once for 28 minutes? Yup! All he could say is "Well she sure is happy...interesting...it is rare to see a recovery like this."
He did say one thing that made perfect sense to me, and I agree with him in every way. "She is one lucky little girl..." YUP!
...and we are lucky to have her.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
An update here, and an update there...
....here an update, there an update everywhere an update! (Can you tell we've been singing the old nursery rhymes?)
So, for a change...Riley first! She is growing so fast it just amazes me. She's developing a sense of humor and a sense of independence for sure! Everything is "I do it!" or "I try!". Her speech development is just flying along...she can now use tasty and delicious in the correct context. However, there are somethings she does not pronounce correctly. Her favorite show to watch is Backyardigans...which she pronounces "Backass". I am unsure how she thinks that is correct, but we are hoping that with gentle repitition she will get it right...one of these days.
Her sense of humor just cracks me right up! Tonight she found it necessary to act like she was eating every pumpkin on the page. "yum yum yum! Tasty!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! It funny Mommy...laugh! Ah ha ha ha!"
Our little Bree is doing just as good as her older sister! With help and support, she can stay up on her hands and knees and rock back and forth. Woo hoo! While we are still a while away from crawling, at least it is a beginning.
Bree had her eye doctor appt today and things didn't go as well as I had hoped, but we are taking it in stride. Bree will be having surgery on December 9th to correct her strabismus (crossed eyes). If anyone that reads the blog has any experience with this surgery, please do share! I like to be as prepared and informed as I can be. I am sure all will be fine, but still...ya know?
Oop! I hear Bree fussing! Better go and take care of the little cutie!
So, for a change...Riley first! She is growing so fast it just amazes me. She's developing a sense of humor and a sense of independence for sure! Everything is "I do it!" or "I try!". Her speech development is just flying along...she can now use tasty and delicious in the correct context. However, there are somethings she does not pronounce correctly. Her favorite show to watch is Backyardigans...which she pronounces "Backass". I am unsure how she thinks that is correct, but we are hoping that with gentle repitition she will get it right...one of these days.
Her sense of humor just cracks me right up! Tonight she found it necessary to act like she was eating every pumpkin on the page. "yum yum yum! Tasty!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! It funny Mommy...laugh! Ah ha ha ha!"
Our little Bree is doing just as good as her older sister! With help and support, she can stay up on her hands and knees and rock back and forth. Woo hoo! While we are still a while away from crawling, at least it is a beginning.
Bree had her eye doctor appt today and things didn't go as well as I had hoped, but we are taking it in stride. Bree will be having surgery on December 9th to correct her strabismus (crossed eyes). If anyone that reads the blog has any experience with this surgery, please do share! I like to be as prepared and informed as I can be. I am sure all will be fine, but still...ya know?
Oop! I hear Bree fussing! Better go and take care of the little cutie!
Monday, November 9, 2009
Who doesn't love some pictures?
Riley and her friend Ella...they had a great time on those stairs!
I love this picture...typical sisterly rivalry. "Riley...get outta my shot! It's my turn!"
Zoned out on the tv
Where's Riley???
There she is!!!!
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