The Gonce Chronicles

2012-01-19T10:17:00.001-08:00

2012-01-19T10:13:00.001-08:00

Time for some good old Gonce family bonding time...waiting for an appointment! Derrick has a swallow study this morning to see what thickness his liquids need to be at...whether we can stay or go thicker or less. Then next monday he has a meeting with the aero digestive team to decide what procedures they want to do on him (biopsies, scopes, etc) and then on Tuesday he will be put under for those procedures. As always we never have a dull moment in our house!

2012-01-19T10:11:00.005-08:00

2012-01-19T10:11:00.003-08:00

2012-01-19T10:11:00.001-08:00

No news is good news

2012-01-08T12:34:00.000-08:00

That seems to be the case in our life. The only time I have excessive amounts of time has been when Bree is in the hospital. Yup...she is again in the hospital, except this time no one has any idea of what is going on. She presented with stroke like symptoms on Tuesday and we went to PCH...long story short, they were not taking me seriously and we ended up signing out AMA (against medical advice) and going to a different children's hospital.

This hospital (Cardon's) has been great at helping us. Her MRI, CT scan and spinal tap have all come back fine so we have no answers. At her worst she could not hold herself up and would slide to the left. She could barely get out words she used to be able to say with ease. She could not drink without spilling immensely and/or choking. She has slowly improved....

Since being here this morning I have noticed that Bree is doing much better! Her speech is still "off" as in I can't always understand her, but she is speaking in 3 to 4 word sentences again and is conveying her wants and needs. As I am typing she is asking me "why Mama?"...she is very weak and can barely stand, and is not able to walk right now, but we will work on that!

The plan is for her to have some labs drawn during the night when her body temp is down, and then an echo and EKG in the morning. As long as all that is clear she will be going home tomorrow with a referral to an endocrinologist and a neuro-developmental pediatrician.

We have a long road ahead of us with recovering lost speech and strength, but we have been down this road before and we can do it again!

FirstGiving - Your fundraising

2011-10-19T21:09:00.000-07:00

FirstGiving - Your fundraising

Hello!

Our family taking part in the 3rd Annual HopeWalk- 5K Family Walkathon to raise money for Hope Kids.

Hope Kids is near and dear to our heart! Through Hope Kids we are able to attend fun, family oriented events that allow us to let loose and forget about the stresses of all Bree's medical needs. The fact that we get to laugh, smile and have a good time is priceless to us, and I know it is to all the other families who are a part of Hope Kids. The smiles on the faces of the kids shows us that they are forgetting about all the needle pokes they have endured, the countless treatments, and the surgeries that have filled their lives. They are living in the moment, and that moment is fun and exhilarating.

The fundraising allows Hope Kids to put on these family friendly events. Without the money to put on these events free of cost to the families, they would not be happening. There would be no movies, birthday parties, baseball games, hockey games and so many more activities. Hope Kids helps families with medically challenged children. These families benefit so much from the little slivers of sunshine that Hope Kids offer.

Please search your heart and donate if you are able. Please know that you will be helping to bring smiles and joy to the hearts of those children who truly deserve it and need it. Please make a donation by visiting my FirstGiving page: http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/goncefam/2011?fge=ask

You can donate online with a credit card. All donations are secure and sent directly to HOPEKIDS INC by FirstGiving, who will email you a printable record of your donation.

Please send our page on to anyone who might like to donate!

Team Bumble Bree
Adam, Tasha, Riley, Bree and Derrick Gonce

Dora Dora Dora the explorer!

2011-10-06T13:17:00.001-07:00

Bree and I are going to see a live play of Dora the pirate tonight with Anneke, Felix and Grace. Thank you to Hope kids for putting this on. This will bring such a smile to Bree's face. I can't wait.

First haircut

2011-09-30T08:55:00.001-07:00

My baby boy is growing up too fast. He now can get up on his hands and knees and rock back and forth. He says 'da da', 'da dee', 'ba ba', and on a rare occasion he will throw 'ma ma' in there. He blows raspberries with his mouth and can sit up unassisted if placed in that position.

He can add another notch of accomplishment to his baby belt. He had his first hair cut today given to him by his Uncle Jason. In case you didn't know, Derrick's middle name is Jason and he is named after his uncle. The fact that Uncle Jason was able to give him his first hair cut is very special (at least to me, being the sentimental person that I am).

2011-09-29T22:26:00.001-07:00

2011-09-29T22:25:00.001-07:00

Check ups

2011-09-29T22:02:00.000-07:00

We had a super fun 3 kid check up today. The best mother in law in the world went with me knowing that all three kids were going to need shots.

Riley is at 61% for her weight, which is 36.31 lbs. She is at 84% for her height which is 41.5'' tall. She definitely takes after her Daddy. She will be our little sports girl. She is super smart and ahead of her peers cognitively.

Bree is finally on the charts! She is at 6% for her weight (26 pounds) and 34% for her height (36.5'')...hooray! I also heard the most beautiful words out of our pediatrician's mouth: "Cognitively, she is doing everything I would expect a three year old to be doing." I think I heard the heavens open up and the angels sing.When Johanna asked Bree one of the questions: "Bree, are you a little boy or a little girl?", Bree stared at her for a few seconds then said "BIG girl." (She said it with an attitude of "duh lady").

Derrick is 20 lbs and 8 ounces, which is at 74% for his age. He is 28 inches long, which is at 91%. She checked his ears and found that he still has fluid built up behind his ear but that his ear looks the best it has since July. We are to continue to keep him on benadryl to dry out his ear and to finish up the last three days of his antibiotic.

When it came time for shots, Riley was hysterical. Even before the shots she was not wanting them. As soon as our pediatrician walked in the room for the visit Riley tapped her on the shoulder and said "Hey...did you know that kids don't need shots anymore?" I love the things that she comes up with! It was a very valiant effort to avoid shots. If I can get a video up here on the blog I will post her hysterical crying pre shots. It is so ridiculous it is funny.

Bree took her shots like a champ, and whined just a bit. She had a few tears. Derrick also is a big boy with his shots and didn't cry either.

When it came time to leave, Riley insisted that she was unable to walk and she was pitiful enough that Grandma carried her to the car. I will send the picture to the blog when I finish up on here. That is a very good Grandma, and Riley greatly appreciated it.

The girls got to go pick out some special treats for being such brave girls!

We suck at blogging.

2011-09-25T20:33:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I suck at blogging. Life just gets busy. And the blog is the first thing to go. So, sorry for the lack of communication...I will try to be a little more "chatty". (Did you ever think I would be accused of not talking?)

So, in a nutshell....Bree had super enlarged tonsils for about 2 months before she got them out a month ago. We have seen much better improvements with speed of swallowing, and articulation of speech. She is still doing feeding therapy, but we had to drop down to one time a week because we maxed out our credit cards paying for the gas of driving 1 hour each way three times a week for 3 plus months. We are just trying to do the best that we can.

Derrick is on the never ending ear infection. We have discovered that he is allergic to penicillin, and one other antibiotic (it starts with an O?) so the only antibiotic he can use is zithromax, which really does not do much for him. It keeps the infection from getting worse, but does not really clear it up. He has had his current one since the beginning of August/end of July. We are waiting on his ENT consult to get tubes put in. We have an appt on October 10th.

Riley has started seeing a therapist because she acts out with her behavior. She is very angry towards Bree and when she gets into trouble she screams, hits, and throws things. We do still give consequences because of her behavior but we do not see much results. Hopefully, the therapist can help us as a family and her as an individual.

I am going through some allergy craziness. I have discovered that I am not a picky eater as I thought....I am actually allergic to the stuff I do not like. However, my body is a medical mystery that likes to keep everyone guessing. The first time I was allergy tested I ended up needing an epi pen and had a bad reaction. Ended up in the ER and was on some heavy duty meds. Last week I had another skin allergy test with a different doctor and even though the skin prick part showed negative on everything, my throat still started to swell. Off the ER I went. Once again I am on prednisone (devil drug) and needing benadryl to help keep my throat swelling feeling and chest pain at bay. I have to lay low and not do very much...which is kinda hard to do with 3 kids, especially when it is your oldest's birthday.

Adam made Staff Sergeant last month and I could not be more proud of him! He finally applied himself and studied his booty off and he made it! This is wonderful news. He also received orders last month that informed him that he will be leaving in April to go serve a one year remote tour in South Korea. We will miss him, but we know that it is necessary for his job. Even military members (and families) who are not serving actively in the war must make sacrifices.

I will keep up as well as I can. Hope you all are doing well!

Happy 4th!

2011-09-25T08:40:00.000-07:00

My Riley Kay is 4 years old today. It seems like just yesterday I had her and could hear her screaming as I was on the operating table. She has far exceeded our expectations and she amazes us on a daily basis. She is very witty and comes up with the craziest things to say. She also seems wise beyond her years and knows things that she shouldn't. I cannot believe how you have grown my sweet girl and I look forward to watching you grow some more in the coming years....

2011-09-20T13:43:00.005-07:00

2011-09-20T13:43:00.003-07:00

The three cutest kids on the block. :)

2011-09-20T13:43:00.001-07:00

2011-07-21T16:05:00.001-07:00

2011-07-21T16:04:00.001-07:00

2011-07-18T20:09:00.001-07:00

2011-07-15T19:08:00.001-07:00

2011-07-15T19:07:00.005-07:00

2011-07-15T19:07:00.003-07:00

2011-07-15T19:07:00.001-07:00

2011-07-15T19:06:00.001-07:00

2011-06-26T18:04:00.001-07:00

A few weeks ago we had Derrick's allergy appointment. To make a long story short, we tried the scratch test but his body didn't respond to it. That just means his immune system isn't quite up to par yet so we are going to repeat the scratch test around eight months old (October). For now I am to continue to avoid dairy, soy, eggs, and peanuts. I am supposed to start trying to work wheat back into my diet to see if it will bother him or not. I am learning lots of new recipes and combinations of food that I can have. One good thing is that a lot of my food has to be fresh, not processed food. This is making me eat healthier and there is nothing wrong with that!

2011-06-14T10:03:00.001-07:00

We made all these frames to send to troops overseas to show our support for them. We are mailing them out today to Uncle Jason who is in Afghanistan serving his fifth tour.

2011-06-14T07:38:00.001-07:00

Good morning everyone!

2011-06-13T21:01:00.001-07:00

He is so Adam's son.

2011-06-13T21:00:00.001-07:00

Riley's drawing of her family and friends. She also included adam's car. I love my girl.

2011-06-13T20:59:00.003-07:00

2011-06-13T20:59:00.001-07:00

Derek holding Derrick

2011-06-13T20:58:00.001-07:00

Celebrations

2011-06-09T15:01:00.000-07:00

I would like to take a minute from our blog to celebrate our friend Ella. Ella is a four year old sweetheart who has been battling cancer for the past three years. She is the most polite, funny, and cutest little girl you will ever meet (well, besides my two girls).

Little Miss Ella has the most supportive parents that a kid could ever ask for. They have done everything in their power to get Ella the best care that there is to offer, and I have never seen a more devoted mother than Celine. Ella has a little sister named Maya, and there is no doubt that they love each other. Just today I watched them playing in the pool during a playdate and out of no where they both gave each other a big hug and then continued playing. So sweet.

Ella got word recently that for now it seems as though her cancer battle is over. She has completed all of her recommended chemo, and nothing can be seen on any of the scans they have taken!

We are so excited for her! Let's have three cheers for Miss Ella Rose...

Hip hip HOORAY!

Hip hip HOORAY!!

Hip hip HOOOOORRRRAAAAYYYY!

Here is a link to their blog post if you would like to read it: Ella Rose Vidrine (click here to be taken to her blog)

2011-06-08T12:45:00.001-07:00

Someone is pretty smitten with his big sister. :)

2011-06-08T10:51:00.001-07:00

Bouncy Bree!

2011-06-08T10:41:00.001-07:00

Derrick's rash

Blogging mobile

2011-06-08T10:40:00.000-07:00

I just enable the mobile blogging with my phone so hopefully this blog will see an annoying onslaught of daily photos of my kids. :)

In other news, despite not eating dairy, egg, soy or peanuts Derrick continues to have a rash and is crying in pain during the day. I caved and gave him tylenol this morning and he is blissfully sleeping in his swing right now. I am now going to add wheat to the "no eating" list and we'll see what happens. Not sure what I will be eating now...but there has got to be something!

Bree is talking up a storm and does a lot of two word phrases. We are working on three word phrases, and hope that she continues to make this amazing progress.

Riley is her usual self. She is funny, and too smart for her own good. Just last night she kept telling me "Daddy and I are going to a movie....do you want to come Mommy?" When I asked Adam about it, he said he had no clue what she was talking about. Ha!

Food allergies

2011-06-03T15:19:00.000-07:00

Since Derrick has been born, we have had a suspicion that something just wasn't right. He had rashes constantly, was extremely fussy and in my mommy gut I just had a feeling. We have slowly learned that he has food allergies.

Now nothing is definitive until we see the food allergist on the 15th, but through trial and error (poor boy) we have learned that he cannot have dairy, soy, and possibly peanuts and eggs. This means that I also have to limit my diet to exclude things that he cannot have since I am nursing him. To say it is a challenge would be an understatement.

Thankfully an amazing friend (Aleasha Bram!) has a son with similar food allergies so she has been my go to gal when it come to all things food related. She gives me the dish on what foods to buy where and what to look for.

Because of his food allergies, we are unable to find a formula that will work for Derrick so that means that I will not be student teaching this fall. My family comes first, plain and simple. As much as I would love to finally complete my student teaching, I would rather have a healthy and happy family. In order to have that, I need to continue nursing Derrick and remain vigilant in our efforts to keep everyone happy and healthy.

There are days where I feel discouraged and frustrated with myself when it comes to these allergies. Just yesterday it dawned on me to check the bread I have been eating, and I discovered that there is milk in it. I felt (and still do feel) horrible. No wonder he has been so fussy.

I just hope that we can get this figured out as soon as possible, and can start moving forward with a plan to get both Derrick and I on a healthy eating/nursing plan.

Riley Kay

2011-05-23T11:46:00.000-07:00

Beautiful blue eyed girl!

Bree Marie

2011-05-23T11:03:00.000-07:00

Such a sweet girl...

Derrick Jason

2011-05-23T10:59:00.000-07:00

He is growing too fast...

Drafts

2011-05-18T20:30:00.000-07:00

I have about 3 or 4 drafts written that are unfinished. Between my preschooler, my toddler, and my 3 month old...life is busy. With just that it would be busy! Here is what our schedule looks like:

Monday: Riley to school. Bree to PCH (intensive feeding therapy) at 2.
Tuesday: All kids home
Wednesday: Riley to school. Bree has speech at home with Mr. Brian Eyre at 9 and PCH at 2.
Thursday: All kids home. Bree has OT with Kim Grant at home at 2.
Friday: Riley to school. Bree has early intervention with Kyla Rock at 730 and PCH at 10.

I am not sure if you noticed, but Bree no longer goes to preschool. For now, we decided to pull her out. It was too many people going in too many directions and being too busy. Sometimes it is important to have a day where you have absolutely nothing to do, and I find that to be very true with kids. Sometimes they just need to have some time to play in their rooms or outside. Lose themselves in their imagination.

Feeding therapy is going okay. It is not the quick fix that I was hoping for (who doesn't hope for that?) but it seems as though they are taking the time to address all of Bree's issues and helping her work through them. This is so that she does not regress when she does finally start eating. On Mondays we can a co-visit with her feeding therapist and occupational therapist. Her feeding therapist is Marnie Madden. We love her. She listens to Bree, and makes it fun for her, but also knows what is best for her. Bree always wants to go play with Miss Marnie.

When we are going to and from therapy we end up parking in the parking garage. In order to park in there you have to park on level 2 or above, which means that we have use the elevator. Every time I ask Bree to push the buttons, she gets very excited and runs forward yelling "Oh boy!". It brings a huge smile to my face every time.

Bree knows her numbers pretty well so using the elevators gives a great opportunity to practice them.

When we started feeding therapy she weighed 22.8, two weeks later she was 22.7 (she had a puke bug the week before), and then she was 23.6 today!! When we started she was 87 cm tall (34.3 inches) and she was the same two weeks later, and then she was 88 cm tall (34.6 inches) today.

Here's to hoping that I do not have drafts...but actual posts more consistently.

At a loss for words

2011-04-08T16:05:00.000-07:00

Well, not really since it takes words to write a blog post, but you know what I am trying to convey.

We just received a check for $500. It is to be used to pay for Bree's feeding therapy gas fund. A friend of my Grandma gave it to her to pass onto us. I do not know which one of her friends it is, but we will be sending a very thankful letter their way here soon.

I feel so humbled and blessed. Wow. Thank you does not seem enough, yet I do not know what else to say.

Thank you to whoever you are. This money means more to us than we can express. It not only means that we do not have to worry about gas money, or wrack up credit cards trying to get to and from her appts; it means that there are people out there who care, and who love our Bree just as much as we do. In today's world, that is priceless.

Thank you.

Mr. Sensitivity

2011-04-04T15:06:00.000-07:00

We got off pretty easy with Bree when it came to allergies and sensitive skin. She does have some reactions to certain brands of medical tape, and sunburns really easily. However, that is the extent of her being sensitive.

Mr. Derrick is a different story. Here is what we have learned about our littlest man so far:

- He is allergic to laundry soap and fabric softener that is not "free and clear".

- He is allergic to the antibiotic ointment they gave us for his eye.

- He has reflux. Which is something we are very aware of because of Bree. Right now, his is being managed by adding rice cereal into the breast milk that I pump for him. His coughing has almost stopped completely since we started this.

We are still learning things about our little guy, but we are also learning how to adapt and help him to feel better. Hopefully this is all that he is going to be sensitive with, but only time will tell.

Ready...set...EAT!

2011-04-02T14:16:00.000-07:00

We got word this week that Bree will be starting her intensive feeding therapy program on April 18th. She will go three times a week (Monday and Wednesdays at 2 and Fridays at 10) for eight weeks. We will be logging lots of miles on our van here soon. Also, the skyrocketing gas prices will be wonderful as well. However, nothing will compare to how wonderful it will be to see our youngest girl learning to eat!

She has been making progess lately and wanting to 'try' our foods, but we are no where near where she should be. This therapy is much needed and we cautiously have our hopes up.

Long time, no type

2011-03-16T12:26:00.000-07:00

Life is a little hectic around here. Since my last update we have had a bit of excitement. Bree ended up getting pneumonia, and that prolonged our seperation parenting technique. After a dose of steroids she is back on the mend and we hope that this is for good this time! She is getting so big so fast...it is crazy.

Riley is still having a hard time adjusting to the level of attention she is getting (or lack there of) and has been acting out. We just got a new discipline book to read and try applying with her that was recommended to us: Positive Discipline for Preschoolers. Fingers crossed that it has some help in there for us. From what I grasp of the little bit I have browsed through the book, it is going to change up our parenting techniques a good bit. Which is needed.

Derrick is doing well and growing like a little weed. He is eating about every 2.5 to 3 hours and is staying awake for longer periods. In the past few days he has started to smile more when awake, and we have even heard a few noises like he is trying to talk.

I am tired all the time, and so is Adam. However, it is to be expected. Today is my first day home alone with them all by myself and we are doing okay. The girls are in their room right now supposed to be napping, but they are actually both on Riley's bed playing the tambourine and singing songs. Derrick is in his swing sleeping away and is due to wake up around 1 to eat.

Hopefully it is not almost another month until I get to update!

Catch up

2011-02-24T18:24:00.000-08:00

Wow! Life has been crazy the last week and a half. Here's a quick rundown (because my little man is due to wake up any moment to eat).

About two days after bringing Derrick home, Miss Bree started up with her cough again and relapsed with her RSV. Because of that, Derrick is basically living in our bedroom when Bree is up and only I am allowed to touch him and take care of him. Adam takes care of Bree, and helps out with Riley too. My mom is here this week (she leaves tomorrow morning) and it has been such a blessing having her here. She is able to give Riley the special attention that she needs. With a new baby in the house, a sick sister, and a recovering Mama...Riley hadn't been getting a lot of attention.

On Tuesday I went to the doctor to have my staples from my c section removed (all 34 of them!!) and as they were taking out the staples in the middle my incision started to open again. They immediately called the surgeon specialist and he fit me in right away. It concerned me how concerned they were, and how quickly I was fit in. To make a long story short, my incision didn't heal correctly and there were pockets of fluid that had formed behind my incision so when the staples were taken out it popped right open. The open portion is about 3 inches across and being left open right now and the bigger pocket has to be packed with gauze strips and changed every day to allow it to heal from the inside out. I go back in next Tuesday to have it looked at. Hopefully it will be healing correctly and I can get back on the track to healing.

With all that has been going on, my Mom has been great to have here. Adam doesn't do well with blood or anything "yucky" so my Mom has been changing my packing. She has been helping with dishes, food and keeping the kiddos entertained and happy. I have promised my Mom that the next time she comes out it will be a little more fun. :)

Our little man

2011-02-23T17:53:00.000-08:00

Derrick Jason Gonce was born on February 15, 2011 at 9:53 am. He came out screaming and crying, which was the best sound in the world. Nothing else would have sounded better to me. He weighed 6 pounds, 3 ounces and was 19.5 inches long.

He could not be more perfect. He is the spitting image of his Daddy when he was a baby. Derrick is a great nurser and there is nothing wrong with him. He's perfect in every way.

We could not be more happy.

So close, yet so far away

2011-02-10T18:41:00.000-08:00

5 days.

Never has 5 days seemed so close, yet so far away at the same time.

In 5 days we will be able to hold our baby boy in our arms, kiss his little cheeks, and count his tiny toes.

I had my last doctor appt today and it went well. I'm not dilated or effaced at all so he will hopefully stay put until Tuesday. I will have one last ultrasound on Monday at 330 just to double check that he is still a happy and healthy little dude.

I am grateful that Adam's parents will be in town and are letting us go out for one last night on the town on Valentines Day. We are getting a couples massage in the morning. Then I have my ultrasound that afternoon, and then we are headed to dinner and a hockey game! It will be great to have something to keep my mind off of the excitement of the next day.

This weekend we are going to hit up the zoo (not sure which day yet), and on Saturday night I have a girls dinner with my bestie Anneke. It will be great to relax and fit some laughs in!

5 days people....5 days. :)

Feeding Tube Awareness Week

2011-02-07T19:23:00.000-08:00

I was not aware that there was a feeding tube awareness week. However, I am so glad that there is! We have some people in our lives that accept the feeding tube, and others that question what we are doing. They ask, "Well have you tried this? How about this? or what about that?" when talking about her eating by mouth. While I understand that it is well intentioned, it does frustrate me. We have therapists who dedicate their lives work to helping kids like Bree, and they see her on a weekly basis. We are trying our best to help her, and encourage her to eat with her mouth. For now, the g tube is a part of our lives.

I am so thankful that there is such thing as a feeding tube. Without it, Bree would not be here. She is not able to eat enough food or drink enough liquids by mouth in order to sustain life. So yes, she does get her nutrition differently than other children. Yes, it does take more time. Yes, I do wish that she didn't have to have a g tube...but she does. So we accept and we do our best with what we have.

I can guarantee she is much better fed than most children her age because we control exactly what goes into her, how many calories, and ounces of fluid/food she has a day. For me, that is a comfort. She is getting the best nutrition that she possibly can be, which is allowing for the best brain and body growth for her. When she is sick, we can still give her food and fluids as long as her little stomach will hold it in. She gets all of her medicine through her tube, and I don't have to worry about how much she spit out.

We love our tubie.

Spectacular Bree

2011-02-07T10:00:00.001-08:00

I just talked with Bree's speech therapist and he said that if she continues to progress at the rate that she is...she will NOT qualify for the developmental preschool program. This is GREAT news! In our state, kids from birth to three who need therapies have their therapies either come to their house, or they go somewhere. Once they are three, they are put into the state developmental preschool program and receive their therapies that way. He said that she may still need some speech therapy at least once a week, but she won't need it enough to have to go to the developmental preschool. His exact words were that she is "borderline" for needing the developmental preschool. He suggested keeping her in the preschool that we have her in now in order to keep her progressing along with her peers since she responds really well to that. Just knowing Bree and her tendencies to imitate what she sees around her, he worries that by going into the developmental preschool she would regress and adapt to what her special needs peers are doing. Since she is borderline for even needing to go, she would probably be one of the higher functioning kids there. He would hate to see her regress when we have the ability to keep her in a preschool where her peers are functioning at a normal level and she would strive to copy them and be like them. My heart is so happy to hear that news!

Bree is home!

2011-02-04T09:07:00.001-08:00

Our little fighter is home! She is still pretty sick, but we can do everything we need to from the comfort of our own home. Nothing is like being able to snuggle with Bree, and watch some good old Dora. :)

2-2-2011

2011-02-02T18:40:00.000-08:00

Little Miss Bree is doing better, but not well enough to come home yet. The doctor tried a trial run of turning the oxygen off for a bit and it didn't go well. She sits right at 90%, which is right on the border. They would like her to be above 90%. So she is requiring about 0.4 liters of oxygen support right now.

Last night she tolerated a night drip of pedialyte at 40 ml's an hour, which is the rate we feed her at home on her pump. Since she tolerated that they did stop the iv fluids, but have left the iv in just in case they may need it.

She also started taking some pediasure today. She had a bolus feed of 8 ounces fed to her slowly over an hour, but needed to be suctioned right at the end of it. The nose suction gagged her, and it all came back up. So the afternoon feed was put on the pump and was just pedialyte in order to make sure she is getting her fluids. Adam did mention that she has gotten 4 ounces of pediasure this evening and he is going to wait a little bit, and try to give her 4 more ounces. They will then start another night drip of pedialyte to keep her hydrated, and we will try again tomorrow to get her up to full feeds (full feeds for us is three 8 ounce feeds of pedialyte).

She cannot come home until she is off the oxygen. They need her to go a full night of being off of oxygen before she can come home. So for now, we wait.

Thank you for all your love and prayers! Keep 'em coming! :)

2-1-2011

2011-02-01T06:47:00.001-08:00

Bree had a rough night last night. She spiked a fever that resisted Tylenol and after giving motrin it did go down. They had to start deep suctioning her because the nurse is hearing some rattling and wheezing in the bottom of one of her lungs. They increased her iv rate to help boost her output. If her fever doesn't go away they are going to run a panel to test for infections.

On another note...14 days until Mr. Derrick makes his arrival into this world!

Evening update:

She seems to be doing better tonight. They did end up doing a blood panel on her and they had to cath her to get a urine sample to check for a UTI. She is still on .5 of a liter of oxygen, but her sats only drop when she is sleeping. Since this afternoon she has been sitting up and playing for about an hour, and she would repeat things Adam would have her say, which is waaayyy better than yesterday. They were able to give her some pedialyte through her tube and she kept that down so they are going to try a slow rate drip of pediasure overnight tonight. Fingers crossed that it works out well! She hasn't really had anything to "eat" since Saturday. I think it will help her body recover so much faster if she can keep down some nutrition.

She is still coughing an awful lot, and requiring suctioning.

Sick Bree

2011-01-31T17:16:00.000-08:00

On Friday, Bree woke up with a small cough and was sneezing here and there. We ended up canceling a play date that we had planned because we didn't want to risk getting our friends sick. Saturday found her to be worse so I started breathing treatments and broke up her feeds so that she was getting smaller volumes more often because I know with her she tends to throw up really easily, and when you are coughing that hard...it is easy to lose your lunch (or breakfast or dinner).

Sunday found her to be even more worse. She couldn't keep down pediasure and when she was unable to keep down Gatorade Adam ended up taking her into Arrowhead Hospital in the afternoon. The doctor at Arrowhead told Adam in an indirect way that Bree has RSV, and that she will be fine because "when she was a baby we were worried about inflammation and swelling in her throat and airway because she was so small. Now it's just like she has a sore throat." He gave Adam a prescription for cough syrup and sent them home. Needless to say, I was not pleased and was going to take Bree straight to the pediatrician in the morning.

We never got that far. When they got home we gave Bree the cough medicine and 2 ounces of Gatorade and then put her in a hot bath with cold vapor stuff in it. We steamed up the bathroom to help her lungs open up and after her bath she got a breathing treatment and was put to bed. An hour later we heard her coughing and rushed in to get her. She was not able to cough anything up, but could not catch her breath. She ended up going pale/gray and completely limp and unresponsive in my arms. We called an ambulance, and just as they were showing up she started to regain her color and within ten minutes she was high five-ing the paramedics and playing with their equipment. We decided to have them transport her to Phoenix Children's Hospital just to be safe.

Once Adam and Bree got to PCH, she became very sleepy and was hard to wake up. That's how she still is. They have started an IV, and she is on oxygen. Her oxygen saturations (aka sats) are still lower than they would like with oxygen (she's around 91%), but they are trying a few different things to help her.

Adam is staying at the hospital with Bree for right now to try and reduce the exposure that I have to all the sick kiddos there. The last thing we need is for me to get sick and end up with complications or something.

Please keep her in your prayers, well wishes, or send healing vibes her way! She's in the best place that she needs to be right now and is receiving excellent care. Now we just wait for her little body to start to heal itself.

Grow baby grow!

2011-01-28T08:52:00.000-08:00

Yesterday morning I had my usual ultrasound on Mr. Derrick. However, the tech decided to do a quick check on Derrick's growth and see where he was at weight wise. Please refer back to this post (click here!) to see what all the measurements mean and to compare to his measurements three weeks ago. When the ultrasound was done I was 34 weeks, 4 days along.

BPD (Biparietal diameter) : 8.65 cm which is the size of an average 34 week, 6 day fetus

HC (Head Circumference): 31.60 cm which is the size of an average 35 week, 3 day fetus.

AC (Abdominal Circumference): 29.58 cm which is the size of an average 33 week, 4 day fetus

FL (Femur Length): 6.89 cm which is the size of an average 35 week, 3 day fetus.

This puts Derrick at 5 pounds, 5 ounces! He is in the 40th percentile (42% to be exact) for his overall development.

This means that if you were to take 100 fetuses that were at 34 weeks, 4 days along and line them all up according to size Derrick would be number 42. So it's not necessarily a bad thing or means that he is behind. It just gives an idea of where he is compared to others.

Taking his weight from 3 weeks ago (3 lbs, 15 oz) and comparing it to now shows that he is right on track. Babies at this point are supposed to gain about a 1/2 a pound a week. So as long as he continues along this trend he will be between 6.5 and 7 pounds when he is born.

What is your guess on his weight and length at birth?

My official guess is 6 pounds, 9 ounces and 20.5 inches long!

Maternity photo previews

2011-01-27T08:51:00.000-08:00

Head on over to Carrie Fay Photography's blog to see my maternity photo previews:

Click here!

We took these last Saturday morning, and had a great time! I am sooo pleased with the photos, and they mean more to me that I can express. The fact that I am still growing Derrick inside me is wonderful, and the photos will be cherished forever.

I recommend that any pregnant woman take the time to make sure to take maternity photos. Whether it be with your own camera or having a professional photographer take them, it is a time in your life that you will want to remember and you will never be able to get that time back once the baby is born. Every pregnancy is different and beautiful in it's own way.

With Riley's pregnancy I had a much further out belly, and I had a distinct line running down the front of my belly:

With Bree's pregnancy we all know I didn't get very far, so I never had the chance to have Carrie Fay take maternity pictures. This is the last picture we have of her pregnancy...it was taken on September 1st, and she was born 9 days later.

I feel so blessed to have made it this far into Derrick's pregnancy. I have appreciated (and still are!) every ache, pain, throw up, and feeling this time around. Pregnancy may not be the most comfortable thing in the world, but nothing compares to holding your child in your arms and knowing that you created them.

I got a little off track with this post...but back to the meaning of it. Carrie Fay is an amazing photographer, and I highly recommend her to anyone needing photos taken of any kind. Whether it be family shoots, maternity, or just for fun shots...she will take the time to make your photo shoot unique and about you.

February 15

2011-01-25T13:38:00.000-08:00

21 days.

504 hours.

30,240 minutes.

1,814,400 seconds.

That's how long we have until our little man enters the world. My c section is set for February 15th at 9:30 in the morning. We will need to be there 2 hours early so we will be checking in at 7:30 am. That gives us enough time to drop the girls at daycare, and make it in time to check in and get ready to have a baby!

Adam's parents will be coming into town on the 14th, so they will get to be with us during the big event.

I can't believe how close it is. I am very excited to hold our little boy in my arms, to kiss his little head, and to show him off to the world.

Proud

2011-01-19T10:33:00.000-08:00

I am so proud of our Bree. I am sitting here a blubbering, crying mess of pride. Just thinking about how far we have come with her is such an amazing thing. I can't even put it into words or make my brain think how to put it together to convey all of my feelings. I don't think that I can.

She started out as this tiny tiny baby in a box that couldn't breathe on her own, couldn't eat on her own, and couldn't be moved or touched or stimulated too much or she would stop breathing and drop her heart rate. She received EXCELLENT care from all the nurses and doctors at Phoenix Children's Hospital (and still does!) and was able to join our family at home in time for Christmas.

Fast forward two and a half years and you have this:

That's right. Bree is a model for Phoenix Children's Hospital! I can't believe it. We had a photo shoot during one of her doctor appointments a few months ago and I signed waivers and all that, but they weren't able to say if they were going to use her or not. Our friend Anneke took her kiddo to their GI appt today and she said that Bree's picture is up everywhere!

I am sure I will be able to write a much more put together and thought out post one of these days about this...but I wanted to share it with you all. Thank you for all your prayers, well wishes, positive thoughts and support you have sent our way during this journey with Bree. We have only just begun to see how amazing of a person she is going to be. :)

Gonce Family: 2010

2011-01-13T20:17:00.000-08:00

A big thank you to Carrie Fay Photography for taking fabulous photos of our family! We had a fun time, felt relaxed...and the pictures show how our family truly is. Hope you enjoy!

Pregnancy update

2011-01-13T14:57:00.001-08:00

So I had my usual ultrasound and doctor visit today.

During the ultrasound, they noticed that Derrick's fluid is lower than it usually is. When they measure it is usually at 12 or 13 and today it was at 9. It looked low to me. She did measure it 3 times to be sure. I asked the tech at what "level" do they start to worry and she said when it gets to 5.

When it came time for the doctor visit, I already have a bacterial sinus infection that I am on antibiotics for (went into urgent care for that on tuesday) and I had to let them know about it. Well turns out that it is good I am on antibiotics because I have a UTI. (you have to leave a urine sample when you show up for them to test). Holy cow! I feel fine and haven't had any pain at all. I asked Dr. Folkestad about the low fluid level and he said that if this was a normal pregnancy, the low fluid levels would be cause for concern and they would start doing ultrasounds twice a week to monitor it. Since I am already high risk because of the T-scar incision and Bree's premature birth it doesn't change anything for me. However, it is something they are concerned about and will watch. He also mentioned that the low fluid levels may be because my body is trying to battle two different infections right now and it is hard work to fight off infections and grow a baby. He told me I need to be making sure that I am getting my fluids in, and that I am eating well. Which is two things that I do pretty good at. He did check me and he said nothing is dilated, changed, and it is exactly how they want all that.

Next visit (on thursday) is when we will be scheduling the c section date. Since nothing is dilating or effacing, he would like to deliver me in my 37th week and I can choose any date from that Monday to Thursday (as long as the hospital has availability). So it would be February 15 to the 18th (**correction** 14th to the 17th...I apparently don't know how to read a calendar)....so we shall see! Adam and I will sit down and talk about it tonight. It is getting close...only 4.5 more weeks....

Mindless Babble

2011-01-08T11:58:00.000-08:00

Just a random assortment of things I feel like sharing.

We still have our Christmas decorations up. Our Christmas tree was taken down a few days after Christmas to be able to put our recliner back in the living room so that we had extra room to sit. I have just been sick for the last week and not had the energy to take down the decorations. And yet here I sit typing a blog instead of taking down the stockings hanging up on the wall. :)

Even while we have our Christmas decorations still up, I had Riley making valentines this morning. She has reached the age where she really enjoys it. I give her markers, some sequins, jewels, pom poms, glue and some hearts cut out and she will sit there and decorate until her little heart is content. I would say we could a good hour of quiet from that this morning. It was heaven. So Nana, Papa, Grandma and Papa, Grandma Sott and Grandpa Sott, and Yaya will be getting valentines in the mail in a week or two.

On Thursday and Friday this week I went and got steroid shots to help mature Derrick's lungs. They actually weren't that bad. I do not have any bruises from them...and it is for a good cause.

Tomorrow I will be 32 weeks pregnant with Derrick. That is huge. At 32 weeks gestation, the risk of ROP and brain bleeds go waaaaayyyyy down. Which were our two biggest problems (and still are) with Bree. Woo hoo! We are in the home stretch.

Well I guess those Christmas decorations aren't going to take down themselves. I better get to it.

Measurements and weight estimation

2011-01-03T18:36:00.000-08:00

We officially have an on-time, 3 lb 15 ounce (estimated weight) little man stretching and jumping around in my belly.

His measurements were great at todays ultrasound. I am 31 weeks, 1 day along. For those of you who are geeks like me here are the official measurements:

BPD: Biparietal diameter (BPD): The transverse width of the head at it's widest.

8.09 cm which is the average size of a 32 week, 3 day fetus.

HC: Head circumference

27.52 cm which is the average size of a 30 week, 1 day fetus

AC: Abdominal circumference

27.42 cm which is the average size of a 31 week, 3 day fetus

FL: Femur Length

6.18 cm which is the average size of a 32 week, 0 day fetus

The weight estimation came out to be 3 lbs, 15 ounces which is 1798 grams. Wow!

To put that into comparison, Bree was estimated at 500 grams at birth and about 1 pound. After being given fluids and meds she was finally stable enough to be officially weighed in at 1 lb, 5 ounces. So Derrick is almost 4 times the size that Bree was.

Derrick should gain about a half a pound a week until he is born. So if I am 31 weeks right now we'll just say he's four pounds. That leaves us week 32, 33, 34, 35 and 36 to gain weight. (We're hoping to do c section at the end of week 36). That will estimate his birth weight at around 6.5 pounds! How awesome will that be???!!

I am so proud that he is doing so well and is growing right on schedule. I am so blessed.

2011...here we are!

2011-01-01T15:23:00.000-08:00

Whew! 2010 was sure full of exciting times, and much growth for our family. I am not as organized or super cool as many of my blogger friends to be able to do a month by month run down of the past year for us. However, I do remember (and will always remember) 2010 as these exciting things:

- Last year at this time Bree wasn't crawling or walking. She had mastered sitting up on her own, but that was it. 2010 has brought us not only a crawling master, but now a walking and running toddler.

- Riley started preschool, and she LOVES it! She is definitely a child who craves attention, and constant structure so she has blossomed. I am very thankful to the help we get from Adam's parents to be able to give our children the opportunity to go to preschool. We would not be able to give them this ourselves.

- We had a wonderful opportunity to have Adam's parents and the three "big" nieces and nephew visit us for 6 weeks this summer. I will remember it forever.

- Many plans changed in our family this year. At the beginning of July I got an unexpected positive pregnancy test...and life hasn't been the same since!

- We thought Adam was going to Korea for a year with him leaving in September, but with the high risk pregnancy we were able to file a humanitarian package and have him stay here with us. I honestly think I would not have made it this far without his help, love and support. He is an amazing husband.

- My student teaching was supposed to start in August, but with our surprise pregnancy we decided the stress, time and exertion of student teaching would not be beneficial and so we are holding off until August 2011.

- My grandparents had a trip planned to come and help during my student teaching, but with it canceled I got to spend that extra time with them. :) It was made extra special by my grandma being able to be present for our "big" ultrasound when we found out we would be having a little boy!

I am sure that there are different things that stand out in Adam's mind when he thinks about 2010, but these are the things that I remember.

2011 will bring us many more new things that the girls will do, it will bring us a beautiful...ahem...handsome baby boy, and a stronger marriage and relationship between Adam and I. Life is good.

Bi weekly dr appts

2010-12-30T19:20:00.000-08:00

Normally these check ups are the routine mundane (we like routine and mundane though!) "How ya doing? Yup, measuring great. Blood pressure is good...we'll see you in a few days" type of deal. However, today was a little different.

I was informed that my labs came back from when they tested me for gestational diabetes. I am good to go and do NOT have gestational diabetes. However, my iron is apparently on the extremely low side to which the doctor said "I am doing to write you a prescription ANNNDD give you some samples so that you can get started on those right away". I didn't even think to ask how low it was, but it's not like I won't see them in a week.

Lots of things set up for next week. They are doing an in depth ultrasound on Monday at 3 to measure Derrick (weight, etc) and to check my anterior placenta to see how it has affected the c section scars so we know what to expect at the c section. Luckily, I have an amazing friend (Anneke!) who is watching the girls so that Adam can go with me to that appointment. I think for Adam and I, it is even that more special to get to share in our excitement of seeing how big he is (anything that is bigger than Bree was is SUPER exciting to us!). I will get a steroid shot on Thursday, and then another one 24 hours later on Friday. The steroid shots will help to develop Derrick's lungs so that when he is born at 36 to 37 weeks we should be able to bring him home when I come home.

I can't believe that we only have 6 weeks left!

Speaking

2010-12-29T08:01:00.000-08:00

Little Miss Bree has been making some amazing strides with her speech lately. Just this morning, for the first time, I heard her playing in her bed (over the monitor) and heard her call out for "Mama! Dada!". She has never done this before. I was so proud!

She has been identifying things lately. She'll see shoes on the ground and inform you if they are "Dada" or "Mama" shoes. Or she'll go get some shoes and carry them around yelling "Shoe! shoe!" and showing it to you. She'll tell you "phone" if she sees you with your phone, and she tries to take it from you to play games on it. She is progressing so well...
Just to satisfy my curiosity, I made a list of how many words she can speak and then a list of how many signs she does:

Speaking:

1. Baby
2. Shoe
3. Yay
4. Whoa
5. Night night (Nigh-nigh)
6. Mama
7. Dada
8. Grandma (Ma-maw)
9. Off
10. On
11. Help (Elf)
12. Please (Peas)
13. Bye bye
14. Read
15. Yeah (Yes)
16. No
17. Ball
18. Tape ("Ttttt" with sign)
19. This
20. Mine
21. Wow
22. Blanket (Ki-ki)
23. Phone (Bone)
24. Diaper (By-buh)
25. Spongebob (Buh-Bob)
26. Riley (Yai-ye)

Signed
1. Help
2. All Done
3. Please
4. Thank you
5. Hat
6. Play
7. More
8. Milk
9. Eat
10. Nods yes
11. Shakes no
12. Bye Bye
13. Tape
14. Wipe

That's 40 things!!

You rock Bree...keep it up! Bree would not be doing as well as she is if she didn't have the help of her amazing speech therapist Brian. He works so well with her, and is constantly challenging her to do better and work harder. It was one of our best decisions we've made to switch our speech therapist. I am proud to be an advocate for Bree. Heck, at the rate she's going she'll be able to tell us what she wants herself here soon!

Weekend in review

2010-12-28T06:51:00.000-08:00

Whew! We've had a crazy last few days. Christmas was great, and we really enjoyed many special moments with the girls. I need to download the videos I took onto youtube for all the grandparents/nana's/papa's/yaya's to enjoy. :) We spent the morning at home, had an early nap and then spent the afternoon at Anneke and Felix's house. Their kids got an amazing water table for Christmas (that I am looking into for our kids) and the kids had such a great time with it. Only in Arizona can you play with a water table in December. I was actually too warm sitting outside in the sun watching them. Dinner was spectacular, (isn't it always when you don't have to cook it?) and Felix's homemade cheesecake for dessert certainly made this pregnant lady very happy.

Riley had had a cough on Saturday, but only once every two hours and was a little tired, but we had figured maybe allergies? She consistently got worse on Sunday and started to spike a fever. Both Sunday and Monday were rough with her. Tired, cranky, not wanting to be snuggled, but looking miserable. The highest her fever has gotten has been 102.5. Last night before bed I gave her a breathing treatment, and we ran the warm mist humidifier all night in her room. So far this morning she seems to be doing much better. No coughing, no fever and it sounds like her nose is draining instead of sounding majorly congested. She still looks sick with her little bags under her eyes, but I hope this is the beginning of the end.

Miss Bree was completely good and great until right before nap time yesterday. I was changing her diaper before nap and noticed her lips looked oddly dry and peeling. So I tried to wipe it off, but with every swipe there seemed to be more and more. So I just gave up and figured I'd check it later. I had an ultrasound to go to that afternoon so I didn't see her too much after nap but when I got home Adam had dinner ready and everyone was at the table. I noticed Bree's cheeks looked flushed and I was worried she had caught Riley's fever bug. However, no fever was found. Upon closer looking though, her flushed look was really a rash all over her cheeks, chin and upper lip. Her peeling lips were still there and yucky looking. We decided to look in her mouth with a flashlight and found the same peeling skin all inside her mouth and back of her throat! I freaked out (which is not common for me) and had Adam rush her to urgent care. All sorts of horrible ailments ran through my mind. The rapid strep test came back negative, and the doctor said it is probably a yeast infection of the mouth. She was sent home with liquid nystatin we are supposed to put on and in her mouth 4 times a day, and an antibiotic she is supposed to take by mouth. This is going to be fun...the non eating child taking nasty tasting medicine by mouth. Good thing I am not against restraining my kiddo. This morning her lips looks worse, her tonsils look more swollen and she has a red patch on her left tonsil. I am going to give it a good 24 hours of the new medicine before we rush off to the doctor again.

So today is hang at home and watch movies day. Hey, at least the kids have all sorts of new toys to play with (and I get to wear pajamas most of the day!)! Gotta look on the bright side. :)

Update

2010-12-22T18:12:00.000-08:00

So the ultrasound went great today! Mr. Derrick has unwound the cord from his arm and let go of it. It is still all bunched up by his arm and the tech showed me, but at least it is not wrapped around it. I got a new 3D picture of him:

My doctor said that I will be having these ultrasounds on Mondays and Thursdays and see him every thursday to be checked until delivery. We are also going to do the steroid shots in two weeks to help mature his lungs since we have to deliver around 36-37 weeks.

Update on Mr. Derrick

2010-12-22T08:11:00.000-08:00

So for the past few weeks I have been having pressure "downstairs" and increased Braxton Hicks at the end of the day. I figured it was nothing to worry about since I had been up all day, and my BH were only at like 3 an hour. Once I would go lay down in bed for a while, the pressure would decrease a bit and the BH would ease up. Every morning when I would wake up I would feel fine with no pressure and all would be well until about 6 at night.

Well yesterday when I woke up the pressure was still there pretty bad. (I know many of you other preggo ladies have the same problems) It just feels like he is going to fall out constantly. So I called my doctor to see if he could fit me in, and I was told to go to the hospital immediately. Kinda freaked me out with how the lady's voice changed as soon as I told her what was going on.

I got there and they got me changed and on the monitors. When they did the exam and checked, they saw watery discharge and were worried that maybe my water was leaking. The amniotic fluid test came back negative (thank goodness!) and she said that I am only a fingertip dilated, but she can feel that Derrick is very very low. However, she did say that she can push on his head and he will move up, which means he's not engaged yet.

She monitored me for another hour and he was very active and his heart rate was going from 160 to 120 pretty quickly, but she said that could be normal for him since he was being so active. He then dropped his heart rate from 160 to 80. So they ordered an ultrasound to check fluid levels. During the ultrasound, they couldn't see my cervix length because Derrick's head is too low and blocking it. She said Derrick looks great except that he had the umbilical cord wrapped once around his arm, and the cord in his hand. He was squeezing the cord until his heart rate drops, and then he loosens his grip. Which then allows his heart rate to jump back up...and then he squeezes it again. We saw him do it on the ultrasound a few times.

There is nothing they could have done about it, and the nurse said it will not cause Derrick any harm since he's basically (for lack of better explanation) causing himself to pass out which then relaxes his grip and resume the blood flow.

So I have another ultrasound today at 1230 to see if he has let go of his cord. And then I start going twice a week for ultrasounds until delivery.

Derrick update

2010-12-09T20:02:00.000-08:00

I went to have my gestational diabetes testing done today and a quick check up/chat with the doctor. When I was in there talking with the doctor I had my list of questions on my phone to ask. When I got to asking him about the pain/pressure I have been feeling he immediately said that he was going to squeeze me in for an ultrasound and "if I wanted we could do the 3D ultrasound too, just for fun". Psh..I wasn't gonna say no!

The ultrasound tech said that Derrick is really low, and head down with his face against my back. She said "Oh wow, he's low". Well now it makes sense that I am feeling the way I am. She wasn't sure if she'd be able to even get pictures of his face because of his position so she had me lay on my side, and she jiggled him with the ultrasound thing. Derrick did not enjoy it, and we got to see his angry face:

He was making that face and waving his arms all around and I could feel him stretching himself out. It was too funny. He did then settle down and we got a few good pictures of one side of his face.

Adam and I think that he looks very much like Riley did in her 3D pictures. The ultrasound tech also commented that it looks as though Derrick is completely bald. He does have a good bit of "cooking" left ot do so he has the opportunity to grow some hair, but we might end up with a bald little boy.

We also got a little bit more information about his delivery date. Dr. Folkestad wants to deliver around 36 to 37 weeks and does not want to let me go too far past 37 weeks due to the risk of uterine rupture. So, to put that into persepctive I would turn 36 weeks on February 6th, and on February 13th I would be 37 weeks. I think we are going to shoot for February 11th (the joy of having planned c sections...you can choose the date!). That would make his birthday on 2-11-11.

I feel so in love with my son, and I haven't even met him yet. It makes my heart melt to see what his little face looks like. I am such a blessed Mama.

No excuses

2010-11-30T18:29:00.000-08:00

There are no excuses that will suffice to explain away my lack of blogging. Except for the fact of being pregnant, having two kids already and a busy schedule. Buuuuttttt...there are many other moms I know who are way busier than I who still find time to blog quite often and keep everyone caught up with thier family.

So without further delay here's a run down of us all...

Youngest goes first!

As of today I am 26 weeks and 2 days pregnant with Derrick. Woo hoo! Officially farther than I made it with Bree (she was born at 25 weeks 5 days). I am much bigger this time than I was with Bree (I am probably the same as I was with Riley), and I am so grateful that I am feeling huge and uncomfortable. Yes, my back/skin/body does hurt all the time, but it means that I have a healthy little (big) baby inside me that is causing it. It could not make me any happier. When I hit the 30 week mark I will start going into the doctor twice a week for stress tests and ultrasounds to chart his weight, growth and happiness. :)

Bree is doing great! I feel like I am always saying that, and then she seems to regress a bit but it's life. Her eating is it's usual non exsistent state. We have some meals where we get very excited to see her eating well, and then she'll refuse any food for the next 3-4 meals. It's like a roller coaster with sharp peaks and low, long valleys. Her physical "stuff" is good, and her therapist is very pleased with her progress. She's doing everything they expect a two year old to do, she just does it slower because of her low muscle tone. She is still very uncoordinated for her age, but she makes it all work. Her speech has made the most progress lately. She's more willing to repeat what you say, or at least say the beginning of a word in order to get it from you. She now says mama, dada, ball, tape, and bath spontaneously and uses them appropriately. She can say a lot of words, but does not use them regularly or appropriately enough for me to list them as "words". She babbles to herself when she wakes up in the morning, which is something new in the last two weeks. She's never made noise before when she wakes up. Speech and making noise isn't something that comes naturally to her (who the heck is this kids mom??! Ha ha.)

Riley is growing up so fast it is crazy. She acts like she is 15 with an attitude. We have been having many discipline issues with her as of lately but I have heard that it is normal for 3 year olds. Many many people have told me that 3 year olds are worse than 2 year olds. We are remaining true to what we tell her will happen, and making sure we are telling her she is making the choice. With that being said, we are also trying to make an effort to praise as much as we can. Riley is an attention kid. She loooves the attention, and I have found that praising her for sharing with Bree is just as (if not more) effective than scolding her for not.

That's us in a nutshell for now. Hopefully it won't take me another month to get updates in here. :)

Roller skating queens

2010-11-17T12:39:00.000-08:00

This morning we went (we meaning Riley, Bree and myself) to our friend's house. Heidi is a saint and lets everyone come over to her house on Wednesday mornings to play. It is so great seeing 8 kids running around a house together screeching with joy and happiness. Did I mention that I am JEALOUS of her driveway? It is long, and the perfect playing area. Park a car at the end of the driveway, and the kids run wild! Everyone brings some of their outside play toys, and we all share. Riley had found Zoie's (Heidi's daughter) roller skates and wanted to try them out. I was expecting her to get on her feet and immediately freak out. She didn't. She rocked thos roller skates! I had to hold her hand, but she loved it. She went down the driveway, then back up and wanted to be done. As I took them off of Riley, Bree wanted to wear them.

I was expecting the same thing out of Bree (freaking out), especially since they didn't fit her well at all. She LOVED them. While I was holding both of her hands, she skated down the driveway and back as well. It is quite a workout, and I didn't want her to get too tired and risk a massive meltdown so I decided that was enough. She melted down when I took them off.

I think that Santa may just have a pair of roller skates in his bag for our family this year.

Letters from Santa

2010-11-03T19:44:00.001-07:00

Wanted to share this with you. A NICU parent support group is helping Santa with his mail this year! They do ask for a donation per letter, but it is going to a good cause to help support critically ill infants, preemies, and their families. Here's the link to the Santa page: http://www.nicupsdonations.org/2010.asp

This is not from the NICU that Bree came from, but from one that her 'preemie friend' Robbie came from. I read the blog his mom writes (http://fertilehope.blogspot.com/), and I email with her occasionally to talk about their eating, PT, etc etc because they struggle with the same stuff.

Please share this with whoever you think may be able to use it, or want to use it. Thanks!

Happy Halloween!

2010-10-31T17:24:00.003-07:00

Hope everyone has a safe and fun Halloween!

Christmas

2010-10-28T09:00:00.000-07:00

A few of the grandparents and family members have asked what the girls want for Christmas. I put together a small list to give everyone ideas...Hope this helps!

Either girl:

Yookidoo Flow and Fill Spout (bath toy)

Lace and Trace Pets

Tinkertoys

Lincoln Logs

Princess Fairy Jumbo Coloring Pad

Bree:

Baby Alive Sips and Cuddles

Mrs. Potato Head Silly Suitcase (great for speech and OT)

Deluxe Latches Boards (Great for OT)

Riley:

Magnetic dress up dolls

Hi Ho Cherry-O

Little Mommy Scrub a Dub Dub Doll

Chutes and Ladders

Blessed

2010-10-28T08:09:00.000-07:00

I am blessed. I have a wonderful husband who appreciates me, and shows it. I have a 3 year old little girl who is more excited about my birthday than I was. I have a 2 year old sweet girl that amazes me daily that she is here with us and has such a sweet personality. And I also have a 21.5 week little man fetus who loves to show his appreciation by kicking me at all odd hours of the night and morning.

Yesterday was a day of realizing how lucky and blessed I truly am. Over 100 people wished me a happy birthday on facebook. (okay so 103 to be exact...it's just cooler to say 'over 100'). My best friend Ashley sent me a beautiful frame with a saying on it that is perfect and fits our family wonderfully. I can't wait to find the perfect pictures to put in it and hang it. My mom sent me a gift card for Olive Garden (yum!) along with a box of goodies for the girls. Riley picked out a candle for me. Riley: "I think it is a stinky candle mommy, but you like it." I do love it and think she is crazy for not liking a pumpkin candle. Bree isn't quite old enough to grasp the whole "birthday" thing, but seeing her stab her piece of cake to take a bite and the whole piece coming up when she picked up her fork cracked me up. She tried to put the whole piece in her mouth at once. It was too cute.

I am so blessed and loved that I feel like my heart is going to explode. It was the best birthday I have had in a good couple of years. What a great way to ring in my 25th birthday. I am blessed.

Pain

2010-10-23T19:52:00.000-07:00

Most people would never think of the sensation of feeling pain to be a blessing, or a good thing. However, once again, Bree has enlightened me to a whole new world of things I never thought I would be dealing with, or I even thought about.

We have known since Bree was little that she has a VERY high pain tolerance.

Here's some examples: She could have IV's put in, or blood draws done without flinching. She would simply just look at the person doing them. And once she learned to walk she could take a very hard tumble or a bump without crying or fussing. She would simply say "Oh."

Now the girls do go to preschool two days a week right now, and recently Bree has been bit three times in the past week. The first two happened on Tuesday and the teachers were able to see it happen. There were incident reports to fill out and sign. The teachers commented that Bree didn't seem to be bothered by the bites. They said that most children scream and cry when it happens and then they are really grumpy and whiny for the rest of the day. They said 5 minutes after Bree got bit she was perfectly fine. One of the bites wasn't too bad, but she had one on the back of her upper left arm that is still bruised even today (4 days after it happened). When we showed up on Thursday to pick her up from preschool Bree had a bright red bite mark on her left forearm. The teacher had no idea. She had not fussed or expressed discomfort at all.

Another incident was when we went to go get her out of her crib from nap. We have been told to be giving her choices and making her shake her head 'yes' or 'no' in order to have her start communicating more instead of us automatically doing things for her. So I asked her "do you want to get up from nap? Yes? or No?" She tilted her chin up, and brought it back down, but ended up bringing it back down right onto her crib. I could hear her teeth clack together and it sounded painful. I even drew in a breath and grimaced, expecting crying. She didn't even flinch or change facial expressions. Didn't phase her one bit.

These are just a few examples, and there are many many more. We are going to make an appointment with her pediatrician this next week because I am beginning to think that this is a problem. We used to think that she was just a tough kid, but it is to the point that it is almost hazardous to her health. She's going to be the kid who tells me her arm feels funny, and it is going to end up being broken.

I never thought I would have to tell my child that even though it doesn't hurt her it's not okay for someone to bite her, and that she needs to tell her teacher.

Are there any other preemies out there that seem to have unusually high pain tolerances that is a problem?

Anatomy ultrasound

2010-10-14T13:35:00.001-07:00

So my ultrasound looked great! Derrick is still a "he", they were just double checking since they had to do an ultrasound anyways. Everything looks great, his heart, lungs, brain, bladder and stomach are all correctly formed. They could not get a good picture of his spine because of his position so they will not "clear" him yet as being medically sound. So I have another ultrasound in two weeks to check his spine.

So here's my weirdo things I kept track of. :) I am technically 19 weeks and 4 days.

His head circumference was measuring 19 weeks and 0 days. (both Riley and Bree have head circumferences that are labeled as "small" or on the lower end of the percentages)

His belly circumference was 20 weeks and 0 days.

His femur bone measured at 19 week and 5 days.

So all in all he seems well. I am excited to get to see him again in two weeks, but am still a little worried that they weren't able to get the correct measurements today.

Family update

2010-10-12T12:10:00.000-07:00

I feel like I am always doing small little updates here and there but never sneak in a good quality post. So here goes!

Riley is doing great things and has grown up a lot in the past few weeks. Yesterday she helped me pick up the living room and I didn't have to prompt her to specifically pick up anything. She picked up things and put them away without being told. I don't know if any other parents out there find that amazing, but I was blown away. Normally my children have to be told "pick up this block...now pick up this one. Now pick up the doll...etc..."

She also spent last Thursday in the three year old room as a test run. For those of you who are unaware (which is probably most of you), the preschool she attends does not allow any pull ups or diapers in the three year old room. You must go on the potty. Riley lasted through naptime (gasp!) without a pull up on, and didn't have an accident at all! Now our only problem to overcome is Riley's insistence that she only goes potty at school. We're working on it.

Bree is becoming more vocal everyday. A very large part of it is still just noises and grunts and whining, but the fact that she is being vocal and not staying silent. She has learned to bring us the television remote which saying "Gab-buh? Gab-buh?" for Yo Gabba Gabba. It is one of the first things she has ever requested vocally. I find it hard not to give in most of the time. She will say "Day-doo" (thank you) on her own if you hand her something, but it you specifically request for her to say it she will only use the sign language sign. She says "Buuuu" for book and will sign it as well. She is a tricky kid to figure out. She will say words verbally for only about a week or so, and then she seems to 'forget' the word. She seems to stick to 3 -5 words that she says regularly.

Her eating is going backwards for some reason. Adam and I can't seem to figure it out, but we are continuing to offer her food to eat, then tubing her so that she continues to get her calories. I guess I need to just look at the positive and realize that it has been the longest she has eaten well, and we need to follow her cues. It can be frustrating.

She is seeking out different things to walk on. We have been told by her physical therapist that it is not common for low tone, unstable kids to want to walk on new surfaces, but we know that Bree is not always the 'norm'. She wants to walk on the rocks where ever we are (which there are rocks everywhere here!), She tries to step up on the curbs and wants to do everything that Riley does and can do. It makes me immensely proud to see her wanting to follow Riley so much, but sometimes it breaks my heart that she can't do it because of muscle strength and stability sometimes.

Derrick is growing fast! I cannot believe that in about 4 months I will be holding a cute, snuggle little boy in my arms.I am now feeling him move every day, usually multiple times a day. He moves a little bit when I first wake up, then again around 1 pm, and then again in the evening. Today he was kicking hard enough to where I could physically see it if I watched my belly. I don't remember the girls kicking this hard this early so I am guessing we have a rough and tumble little boy on the way! On Thursday I have an anatomy scan for Derrick, where they will double check to make sure he is still a he, and to make sure his heart, brain, kidneys and all other organs check out okay. I am very nervous that all will be okay. I have learned to never take anything for granted, even a healthy child.

I am doing okay. I still struggle with morning sickness, and have days where I can do a whole bunch of things, and then days where I get winded just cleaning off a counter. However, my brain now feels like it is capable of having complex thoughts. I have come out of the fog!! I feel more like talking with others, and getting out of the house to see friends. I am trying to think out and figure out how we are going to do the bedroom situation with all three kids. I could go on and on about it, but I will spare you the details. I think I am wayyyy overthinking it. Oh well. It will all work out.

Adam is super husband and has really been helping me out. He rocks with the girls, and isn't afraid of hesitant to step up and make dinner, dump garbage, do dishes, or pick up the living room. One of these days I am going to insist that he go out with his friends and let go! Have some fun.

Whew! My fingers are a bit sore, and I am hungry. Now to go stare at the refrigerator and think that there is nothing to eat. Ha!

Feeling productive

2010-10-08T13:35:00.000-07:00

I love the feeling of accomplishment when things are completed and done. So far today I have done dishes (not usually my job), had therapy for Bree, taken Bree to get her g tube changed (thanks Anneke!), taken out dinner to defrost, called about our Fisher Price Rainforest Pack and Play recall, and called and applied for Long Term Care for Bree.

Today is the first day in a while that I have not had a migraine and I am so thankful to feeling up to do doing stuff. I think I am going to try and tackle Bree's clothes this afternoon after they wake up from nap. Woo hoo!

Things I need to do...soon.

2010-10-05T19:50:00.000-07:00

Call about consolidating my student loans.

Call about our recalled Fisher Price Rainforest Pack and Play.

Clean our Bree's three drawer bin that is in her closet so that I can put the clothes we have for Derrick in them. (thanks Gavin!)

Go through Bree and Riley's drawers. Bree has grown out of 18 month clothes and into 24 month (hand me downs coming your way Grace!), and Riley has grown out of 3T shirts and into 4T shirts. She has also grown out of 2T pants and into 3T pants. For some reason Riley has always been different on her pant and shirt sizes, while Bree is the same for both.

For some weird reason (we'll blame it on nesting) I really want to clean and scrub my kitchen cabinets. It doesn't really NEED to be done, I just feel the need to do it.

Now I am hoping that writing this down will hold me accountable for doing these things. If it works you guys will be seeing more of what I need to do. Whatever works, right?

Things I never thought I would be saying as a Mom.

2010-10-04T07:47:00.000-07:00

I have very many of these sayings, but I always forget to post them when they happen because there are only one or two in a day that I come across. Yesterday we had two.

"We don't pet people"

and

"Get that fork out of your ear"

Riley wouldn't stop petting a friends kid on the head. (sorry Jenn!) It was freaking Mady out, and Riley just wouldn't understand that she didn't like it. However, once they left Riley told me "We don't pet people Mommy, not Baby Mady. She's a people."

At dinner Bree was given a fork to eat her grilled cheese sandwich and tater tots (it's a sensory thing...sometimes she's rather not touch it). However, when I looked up two of the four tines were halfway in her ear prompting me to inform her that's not what we do with forks.

I wonder what pearls of wisdom I will get to pass onto my kids today.

What a weekend!

2010-10-03T17:27:00.000-07:00

We are home-bodies. We like to stay home, to play in the backyard, watch movies and just be lazy. That's what we have done today. However, yesterday is another story.

We had planned on going to the park on Saturday and taking the girls 2 and 3 year old pictures. (coming soon!) When you live in Arizona that means you better get to the park early to beat the heat. So we went to the park about 830, took pictures, walked around and played on the playground. Then we ran some errands that needed to be done like paying rent, and going shopping to Target and Walmart. We even shared a pretzel and soda at Target (my favorite!).

On the way home we got a call from Anneke offering for us to go with them to a Hope Kids carnival with them. We jumped on the chance to go do something fun with friends! We ran home, dropped off our groceries, and met up with the Marchese family. We had a good time at the carnival and even met up with Andrea and her family. Riley seems to have developed her first crush on Owen, telling me that he was cute and wanting to go say hi to him. Of course she acted shy once we went over to him, but when we split up from them she had wanted to know where the "cute boy went". We'll have to get together with them soon!

It was dreadfully hot, but worth the fun. Both girls got a "face" painting (Riley wanted hers on her leg), and they got to go down an inflatable slide with their Daddy. We learned that Riley likes cotton candy, and Bree does not at all. It was a great event and I need to look into our family joining Hope Kids. I'm pretty sure Bree meets the criteria for joining, but had never considered it a possibility prior to this.

We took the long way home in hopes that both girls would nap, but oddly enough only Riley napped. Bree was content yelling and hollering the whole way home. We stopped to get Adam's hair cut on the way home, and that was another 45 minutes. We finally made it home at 430 and we were spent! Both girls were kinda naughty for the rest of the night from being so tired so we decided to stay home today.

Home sweet home.

Baby kicks

2010-09-30T20:57:00.000-07:00

Adam was able to feel Derrick kick twice tonight for the first time. Amazing. Made my night. :)

Three year old check up

2010-09-29T14:02:00.001-07:00

So last year at her two year old check up she was 3rd percentile in weight and 95th in height. (I don't remember her actual height or weight) They were concerned about her weight and suggested us giving her instant breakfast with her milk, possibly mixing in oil in her diet (all stuff we do with Bree).

This year she was 30 pounds and 37 inches tall. Which places her at 45 percentile for her weight (yay!) and 50 percentile for her height. The doctor was pleased and said she is evening out with her growth, which is what she was hoping for.

I was surprised that a bit of the visit was the doctor asking Riley questions. (What's your name? Are you a boy or a girl? Is Daddy a boy or a girl? Favorite color?) I am so used to being asked the questions it was a change. I will say I was proud when Riley was asked if I was a boy or a girl she said Mommy is a good girl!

3 and 24

2010-09-26T10:06:00.000-07:00

These are two numbers that are very important to our family this weekend.

Yesterday our first baby girl turned three years old. She went from this:

to this big beautiful (little) girl:

She is a sweet, opinionated, determined little girl who has a kind heart. She loves her sister, and will tell me she already loves Baby Derrick. She is a wonderful big sister and I can't wait to see her grow in the coming years.

Speaking of our family, we happen to have a pretty awesome guy in our family that we love very much. In fact, it is his birthday today and he is satisfied with hanging out at home and watching football. Adam is the best husband I could ask for. He is very loving, and is not afraid to express his affection for me or for his kids (do you know how weird it is to say "kids" and not "girls"??). He tells me everyday that I am beautiful, he compliments the girls and is far more patient with them than I am. He truly balances me out. He is more of a relaxed laid back guy, and it has rubbed off on me in the past few years, which I think it just what I needed. Happy 24th Babe!

Potty success!

2010-09-22T19:30:00.000-07:00

Riley has had two successful times that she has peed in the potty today! Most kids want a piece of candy, a cookie, or some sort of sweet as a treat for a reward. My child wants her Grandma to push her on the swing. Honestly, I will do whatever it takes to get her potty trained.

Heck I think I am having wishful thinking but maybe...MAYBE we can get Bree potty trained too by the time Derrick comes. :)

Boy oh boy!

2010-09-17T19:23:00.000-07:00

I tried to post an ultrasound picture on here from my phone, but it didn't work. I can just tell you what was on it....little boy parts! Woo hooooooooo!!! We couldn't be happier! My heart just about burst with happiness when those little parts came up on the screen.

His name will be Derrick Jason. Adam and I just really like the name Derrick. It is a very strong name. The middle name of Jason is after Adam's brother who's name is Jason. His brother is a wonderful man who would do anything for his family and friends. I hope that Derrick grows up to be like his namesake...it would make me so proud.

He will born at 36-37 weeks so he'll be born anywhere from February 6th to the 20th. We can't wait to hold our baby boy in our arms. Now onto looking for the perfect coming home outfit...

Oh no! My teeth are all gone!

2010-09-15T19:06:00.000-07:00

We have a picture up on the refrigerator of when Riley had turned one year old. (Our friend Carrie Fay took it!) Riley has a big cheesy grin on her face and she was so happy and giggling the time the picture was taken. However, Riley only had her two bottom teeth when she turned one an din the picture you can see that quite clearly.

Tonight when I was putting away dinner Riley was laying on her stomach looking at the pictures that were on the fridge. (Don't ask why she was laying on her stomach...I have no idea). She saw the picture of herself when she was little and she exclaimed "MAMA!!! Oh no! My teeth are all gone!!!" I just busted up laughing and told her "I don't know, where'd they go?" She Said "I don't know Mama...I just don't know!" I just chuckled at her. She cracks me up.

She proceeded to carry around the picture for the next ten minutes looking at it and muttering to herself about her teeth.

Tasting

2010-09-15T09:09:00.000-07:00

Bree has been into 'tasting' new things. This is FANTABULOUS! It is one step closer to her wanting to eat. So far in the past few days we've successfully tried peanut butter toast, peaches, a bean burrito from Taco Bell, a hard taco from Taco Bell, peach yogurt, mac and cheese, ritz cracker, hamburger patty, chocolate teddy grahams, and few other things I can't remember. So far the most successful has been the peach yogurt, and the bean burrito.

I am so stoked for her new willingness and I really hope it continues. Fingers are crossed and hopes are up!

In which I talk to (about) my sister.

2010-09-14T13:55:00.000-07:00

I don't remember which blog it was I was reading (actually I do now, it was Pioneer Woman), but she said that when blogging you should act like you are talking to your sister. Now, my sister lives in Oregon and growing up I only saw her every other weekend. We have the same Dad, but different Moms...but she is my sister and that is all that matters. She is younger than me (she's 18) and we are both in different seasons of life. She is just starting college (ohhh I remember those days!), and has very busy days between friends, college, and trying to find a job.

I wish that we both had more time to talk to one another. However, every time I seem to get on the phone my children have this unrelenting urge to run around screaming, climb on counters or beat each other with baby dolls. So when we do talk it is mostly me hollering at the kids to "not do such and such" or "what are you THINKING?". If we ever do get to talk uninterrupted we do talk well with one another. We can talk about just about anything. Like how much we love our Grandma's marshmallow/kix/ricekrispie/whitechocolate cookies, or her updating me on how our little brother's love life is going, or me telling her about the crazy things the girls have been doing.

So, since we don't get to talk very often, I will heed Pioneer Woman's advice and act as though I am telling my sister about the latest news with our family. So forgive me if I seem to rattle on forever...or tell about little random tidbits of information that don't seem to matter.

Happy Birthday Bree!

2010-09-10T20:09:00.000-07:00

My beautiful little daughter turned two today. I cannot believe it. She is developing into a caring, kind, loving, and playful little girl. She is quick to smile, and quick to give kisses. She is not without a two year old attitude however. She has recently started throwing fits, and being very stubborn. Developmentally it is appropiate for her to be doing all this so it is wonderful for us to see her rolling on the floor flailing her arms and screeching.

Since Bree isn't a fan of cake, and she does like yogurt we decided to give her some chocolate pudding as a birthday treat. She loved it! She ate 3/4's of a container..which a good bit for her.

I hope the next year brings her much happiness, progress, and love. More love than her little self knows what to do with. :)

Slacker

2010-09-08T19:26:00.000-07:00

*raises hand* That's me. I am a slacker.

I have kind of stunk at this blogging thing lately. I am going to try and start doing better at this. Blogging when I think of a cute story of the girls, or when I take a picture of something that I want to share.

Here's a run down of our past week.

This past Thursday Adam and I went to a Cardinals football game. It was a preseason game again the Washington Redskins. Adam's mom flew in to watch the girls for us. The game was nice to go to, and I know that Adam really enjoyed it. I don't know too much about football (nor do I care to), but it was fun to be a part of the crowd and the excitement. Heck, the tickets were free from Adam's work so I can't complain!

Saturday we had the girls' birthday party. Princess party mania! The girls looked so cute dressed up in their princess dresses. Riley was Cinderella, and Bree had her Belle dress on. Bree's dress was a little big on her (it fit length wise but not width wise...if that makes sense) so I had to doctor it up with some medical tape. What would we do without medical tape?

We had so many guests that came over and it made it a great time! We had some good food, great company, and even better cake! I was immensely proud of both girls because they both were able to blow out their own candles this year!! (HUGE thing for Bree!) Riley ate the frosting off of her cake, then pushed her plate forward saying she was done. Bree grabbed Riley's plate and pulled it towards her and started stabbing both pieces of cake with a fork in each hand. Pretty awesome for a kid who doesn't even like food. I was a nerd and forgot to charge the batteries on the big camera so I have to pull the pictures off of our little camera from the party. (Yes, we have a "big" camera and a "little" camera...and that's what I call them. Ha ha)

On Saturday my acid reflux was bugging me, which had affected my voice to where it sounded like I was sick. Many people at the party had asked if I was sick and I denied it many times. I didn't feel sick at all (besides normal pregnancy blah), but I think I jinxed myself. Sunday I woke up feeling pretty yucky and Monday morning I went to urgent care. I do not recommend going to urgent care on a holiday. I waited 2.5 hours before being seen. I was diagnosed with a sinus infection, double ear infection and aggravation of my asthma symptoms from acid reflux. I left with three prescriptions (zantac, augmentin, and an inhaler).

That night I had a really rough night with my asthma and Adam even came rushing home because it was so bad. I returned back to urgent care and was diagnosed with early pnuemonia. I was given a steroid shot, and was given albuterol treatments to take home. I also got some prescription strength cough medicine. Woooo-eeeee. I hadn't been that sick in a really long time. Even this morning I was completely exhausted and the girls got to watch a lot of cartoons. However, I am feeling more like myself tonight. Hopefully tomorrow is an even better day.

That's us in a nutshell right now!

Noodles

2010-08-24T13:43:00.000-07:00

Noodles can be so tricky to eat.

Caved.

2010-08-22T18:22:00.000-07:00

So I caved and had Adam give Bree a tube feeding for dinner. The best feeding we had was the one I blogged about. All of the others she refused to feed herself, and it was a struggle to get her to open up for us to put a spoonful in her mouth. We would struggle to get her to eat a whole container of baby food for one meal. That alone would take take one hour and is only 80 to 110 calories. Multiply that by 3 meals and two to three snacks and you've got 300 to 400 calories. She needs 1,000 calories a day.

That doesn't even count the fluid intake she needs. That's more the reason why I caved. No wet diapers today. So, we decided to resume our normal g tube feeding schedule for her. I wish that we could find someone (who is a professional) that knows more about tube weaning. All the doctors we have either don't support it, or don't know much about the process and what is normal. I'm going to have to do more research.

Getting Bree off of this g tube seems like a daunting impossible task. How are we supposed to get her off of it with her maintaining her calories, her fluid intake, and some amount of our sanity?

Success, if only for a moment!

2010-08-20T13:42:00.000-07:00

I don't know if this is pretty common with other preemies, or if it just how Bree is, but she is a one trick wonder. She will say something once, only to not say it again for months. Or she'll eat really good for one meal, then will refuse to even look at a spoon the next meal.

Every so often, (every couple of months) we try to wean Bree. This means that we do not offer any foods or liquids by tube during the day. At night we try to "pump" as much formula into her as we can to offset any calories that she missed during the day. We follow her cues with telling us if she is ready for this huge step of weaning off of the tube in some form.

In the past we've only gotten about three days into it before Bree cries uncontrollably from hunger, but refuses to eat anything at all. I can't stand to see her in such distress so I cave and take that as a sign that she is not ready. Usually it takes until the second day of not eating before Bree will respond to hunger.

This is the fourth (??third??) time we've tried this. Lately when we go to feed Bree by tube she lifts up her shirt and plays with her tube. I'm not a fan of that behavior because I want her to associate hunger and eating with her mouth. So I decided to try weaning her again this "weekend". So for Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday we are buckling down and remaining positive.

This morning I gave Bree some toast and bananas on her tray. I made her some chocolate milk to drink, and got some yogurt to spoon feed her. She ate about half the container of yogurt with much encouragement, silly noises, and funny faces on my part. She tried two drinks of chocolate milk and then did not want more. At that point she pulled up her shirt and started playing with her tube, while refusing to eat anymore by mouth. I told her that we were not using our tube today, and only our mouths. She adamantanly signed "All done" so I honored her request.

About three hours later she was getting to be really whiny. She came up to me and lifted her shirt up, pointed to her tube, and stared at me. I told her we're not using your tube today, we're eating with our mouths to fill our bellies. She just stared at me with a blank expression. I told her if you're hungry, sit in your chair. She sat.

I went and got the yogurt she didn't finish for breakfast, but she was refusing to allow me to feed her. On a whim, I gave her the spoon and I held the yogurt container. She loved dipping the spoon into the container then smearing the yogurt on her mouth and nose. I allowed her to do that for five minutes, then I held her hand over her spoon and showed her how to put it in her mouth. I then encouraged her to take bites herself. Every bite I would remind her, and soon she started to comply every time.

Soon she had finished the half a yogurt container so I went and got a new one. It was slow going, but an hour later it was gone!!!! Yes, she made a mess but she ATE!! I was bursting with pride (and still am!). When that container was gone, she threw her spoon on the floor and signed "All done". 5.25 ounces of mixed berry yogrut!! Impressive!!!

Now after naptime, we are trying out spaghetti o's. I can't wait to see that mess! (Really...I can't...seeing Bree with a messy face is so rewarding!)

Surprise!

2010-08-18T17:12:00.000-07:00

At the beginning of July, approximately 6 weeks ago, Adam and I got a big surprise. A big fat positive pregnancy test. We weren't even trying...in fact we were actively not trying. So to say we were surprised was an understatement. The day that I told Adam, all he could say was "All righty then".

Our family at that time was preparing for Adam to leave in September for Korea to be gone for a year. We had plans of Adam's parents watching the girls on his midtour so him and I could meet in Japan for a romantic vacation. As of right now, Adam has put in a humanitarian package to see if they will defer his orders until after the baby is born. With my problem pregnancy with Bree, we are both concerned that the same things will happen with this pregnancy.

Speaking of problems, this pregnancy has had a small issue so far. I have had a bleed with the placenta of this baby already. So I am taking it easy, not lifting heavy stuff (aside from the kids when necessary), and resting up. We had an ultrasound today and found out I still have a small bleed which is measuring one centimeter and it is on the edge of the placenta instead of behind it like it used to be. So it's smaller and is in a less dangerous place. (thank goodness) We would appreciate any prayers, good thoughts, and healing vibes about the safety and well being of the pregnancy.

During the ultrasound we had the baby looked great! The heartbeat was amazing to hear, and it was beating strong at 167. The baby even measured three days ahead of it's due date...made a Mama proud to know it's growing great! It was a little bugger and wouldn't move for the ultrasound tech no matter how much he jiggled and pushed on my belly. It took a half an hour to get the measurements that were needed because the baby wouldn't move. Right when the tech said that he just had to scan the rest of my uterus and ovaries the baby started moving. He was a great tech and let us just watch the baby move for a few minutes.

The official due date is March 6, 2011. The baby will however, be born at 36 - 37 weeks due to the "T cut" I have from previous c sections. Going any farther than that would be putting the baby's life, and my life in danger due to the risk of uterine rupture. My doctor will be keeping a close eye on me and it will be closer than most pregnant women get. I will get to go into the doctor twice a week for monitoring once I hit 25 weeks (when Bree was born).

We are praying and hoping for a 37 week, 6 - 7 pound healthy little baby to hold in our arms in February. In the meantime, I will take care of myself in order to help this baby grow, Adam will support and help me as much as he can (which he's been great at!), and Riley will teach Bree all the tricks of the trade of being a great big sister. We welcome and appreciate any and all prayers, good thoughts, and well wishes!

Oh the things Riley says!

2010-08-12T19:47:00.000-07:00

Not to toot my own kids horn, but Riley is pretty advanced in her speech. She always has been. I think she got it from me and all my incessant talking. Ha ha! Lately she has been really inquisitive about everything, asking questions and adding her own opinions. Lately here's some of the things she's been saying.

Right now I am wearing a ruby and diamond necklace that my Grandma gave me when I had Riley. It was a necklace that my Grandpa gave her for their tenth wedding anniversary. It is beautiful. Riley thinks so too. Everyday she comes up to me, gently takes the necklace part in her fingers and says "I like your jewel Mama. Who give it to you?" I tell her Nana gave it to me.Then she tells me "It is so pretty. I like it." She does this every day. Today she went and got one of her bracelets that I got her for Christmas this last year. She proceeded to put it on, put it up in my face, and say "Nana got me this. You like it?"

Riley likes to come into the bathroom when I am getting my makeup on, and do my hair in the morning. About two weeks ago I was putting my mascara on and Riley comes walking in. She asks me what I was doing and I told her I was putting on my mascara. She scrunches up her face, thinking for a moment. She then says "My eyes make scary??" I laughed so hard.

Just today while I was curling my hair Riley watched me for a few minutes. She suddenly blurts out "Why you cooking your hair Mama?"

Oh the mind of a two (almost three!) year old. So innocent and unique.

That familiar ache

2010-07-26T13:18:00.000-07:00

The last time I had to leave Bree somewhere without either of her parents was when she was in the NICU. I always felt like I was leaving a piece of my heart behind, and I swear my heart would physically ache until I was by her side again.

Today that ache came back when I took her to daycare this morning. She is trying out her new daycare for Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday this week. It allows her time to get used to the new environment, and for them to get used to her. I go in at lunch time to show them how to feed her. Today Bree had a puke saved up for them, so I feel a little bad about it. However, it is a part of who she is. It's not pleasant, but it is what it is.

There have been some good signs today though. When I took her in this morning she clung to me for a few minutes, but then wandered over to the table and tried to take someone elses cheerios. The teacher got her set up with her own cheerios (which she spilt all over the table and floor). However, she sat down and ate some cheerios. I left with her happy and content.

When I showed back up around lunch time to pick her up (so I could show them how to feed her), she was sitting at the table by herself drinking a sippy cup! She whined when she saw me, but after a few moments of cuddle she saw that the other kids were playing with bubbles and she wanted to go. I put her down and she went right over in the middle of all the kids and shrieked with happiness.

I think she is going to fit right in, and do just great. Now if only this ache in my heart would go away.